The Crackbook » Quotes by Others

Kevbo

Paula Anne — Fri, 09 Apr 2010 14:48:01 +0000

“There’s nothing a blow job can’t fix.”

Brett Yo

Paula Anne — Thu, 08 Apr 2010 01:24:50 +0000

(What Brett wishes was on the door)
“Professor Spitler was hit by a milk truck. She drowned in the milk. No class today.”

Luke Duke

Paula Anne — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 15:40:26 +0000

“It is what it is, I guess.”

My life as Liz: Sully

Paula Anne — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 15:36:39 +0000

“I like George Bush, not because he was a good president, he wasn’t that. He was just an entertaining bad ass. Way to be boring Obama!”

Skipper

Paula Anne — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 15:09:14 +0000

“I’m wearing my fat shirt, so you can’t see my fat.”

Kev

Paula Anne — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 15:07:38 +0000

“I heard everytime you drop ‘em, they lose time.”
(Talking about blackberry phones)

Kelly Cutrone

Paula Anne — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 15:06:32 +0000

“If you have to cry, go outside.”

Jared

Paula Anne — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 15:05:18 +0000

“I’m 95 percent of Marion County. I’m a nigger.”

Inscore

Paula Anne — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 15:04:28 +0000

“That’s in the form of a question.”

Harr to Me

Paula Anne — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 15:03:35 +0000

“Like crackers just came out of your nose. That’s gross.”

E603

Paula Anne — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 15:02:22 +0000

“I have to do the weirdest stuff when I’m hungover.”

Scooby to Albert

Paula Anne — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 15:01:33 +0000

“You’re back in the goons.”

Alex A

Paula Anne — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 14:59:52 +0000

“You can’t lie when your drunk.”

Skipper

Paula Anne — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 14:58:25 +0000

“Guys are like peacocks.”

Dane Cook

Paula Anne — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 14:57:49 +0000

“I don’t like the word abortion. I prefer the term cancelled baby.”

Chaz

Paula Anne — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 14:57:03 +0000

“I’m all skipped out.”
(Talking about how he can’t skip anymore college classes)

BB

Paula Anne — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 14:56:09 +0000

“We’re too smart for our common sense.”

revertfashion

Paula Anne — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 20:04:08 +0000

“We all dream alone.”

E603

Paula Anne — Tue, 09 Mar 2010 00:14:39 +0000

“I just saw a couple screaming at each other in the street. Classic Valentine’s Day.”

Peretti

Paula Anne — Wed, 03 Mar 2010 03:23:30 +0000

“Twitter is a simple service used by smart people. Facebook is a smart service used by simple people.”

Wyatt to Kristy

Paula Anne — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 21:46:10 +0000

“Don’t make me come there and touch you where it counts.”

Sancho

Paula Anne — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 21:44:53 +0000

“How do I wake up and not care for someone?”
(Talking about she all of a sudden hated a certain person)

Anonymous

Paula Anne — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 21:43:15 +0000

“Fuck the nigs.”
(When the trailer got stolen)

Mildred

Paula Anne — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 21:40:34 +0000

“Have a f’ing pen pal in China.”
(I forgot what this was about but it was funny)

Me and Kris Rogers

Paula Anne — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 21:38:52 +0000

Me: “I’m gonna lock you out the house.”
Kris: “I got a debit card.”

Kristy

Paula Anne — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 21:35:19 +0000

“That’s vital to my life.”
(Talking about the only pen she had for finals)

Miami Social

Paula Anne — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 21:33:15 +0000

Katrina: “I’m off like a prom dress.”

King of the Hill

Paula Anne — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 21:28:29 +0000

“Why would anyone do drugs when they could just mow a lawn?”

Commercial

Paula Anne — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 21:25:30 +0000

“Clorox. Kill the germs, not the fun.”

Casey and Me

Paula Anne — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 21:23:34 +0000

Casey: “Hey, what’s up?”
Me: “Just sitting in the bed with Kristals. Kristals=Kristy.”
Casey: “Yeah, I know what you meant. And well I’m sitting on the couch with Chrissy. Chrissy=Chris.”

Tom Hall

Paula Anne — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 21:19:00 +0000

Tom’s boss: “I belong to the K.M.A club.”
Tom: “What’s the K.M.A club?”
Tom’s boss: “Kiss My Ass.”

Professor Sandra Lee

Paula Anne — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 21:17:11 +0000

“That’s what I get for being color coordinated instead of practical.”
(She bent down and her zipper busted and then said this)

Mildred and Me

Paula Anne — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 21:13:58 +0000

Me: “I just made a 48 on my test.”
Mel: “Dudeeeeeeee. I’m about to do the same thing. Haha ”
Me: “Hahaha! Well, good luck dude.”
Mel: “After tonight I’m saying fuck it. And then I’m going to get about a 15 on my lab practical.”
Me: “Well. That’s better than a zero.”
Mel: “Yeah. I’m hoping 15 is how much my name is worth, because that’s about all I’ll be able to write on the test.”
Me: “HAHAHHA….crackbook.”

Anonymous

Paula Anne — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 21:04:11 +0000

Person 1: “I’m gonna shave my legs.”
Person 2: (watching tv)
Person 1: “Can you hear me?”
Person 2: “Yes.”
Person 1: “What did I say then?”
Person 2: “You hate nigs.”

E603

Paula Anne — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 20:59:03 +0000

“Apparently Fedex hasn’t learned my sleeping schedule yet.”

Anonymous

Paula Anne — Mon, 01 Mar 2010 23:41:46 +0000

(What the kids found while babysitting)
“And they found my texts today and found some about smoking and shit. I had to say a bowl was for a bowling pass. All kinds of bullshit, then called them nosey.”

The Office: Dwight to Jim

Paula Anne — Mon, 01 Mar 2010 23:37:23 +0000

“Come along…….(pause)……. after-thought.”

Tyson Ritter

Paula Anne — Mon, 01 Mar 2010 23:36:14 +0000

“When your hat is upside down, the hat catches the rain. When your hat is rightside up, the rain catches the hat.”

Tom Hall to a rookie

Paula Anne — Mon, 01 Mar 2010 23:34:44 +0000

“Now, look rookie… I know you don’t know what to do, but damnit look like it!”

President Bush

Paula Anne — Mon, 01 Mar 2010 23:33:03 +0000

“I have opinions of my own-strong opinions-but I don’t always agree with them.”

Mel and Bubble Gum

Paula Anne — Mon, 01 Mar 2010 23:31:55 +0000

Mel: “I feel like if I drive right now, I’ll drive right over a cliff.”
Bubble Gum: “I feel like you do that anyway.”
(Talking about Mel always drives like she’s gonna kill herself)

Anonymous

Paula Anne — Mon, 01 Mar 2010 23:29:59 +0000

“I’ve smoked more weed this semester than I’ve ever had in my life, drank less, and had the highest GPA of my college career.”

Jeff Lewis

Paula Anne — Mon, 01 Mar 2010 23:28:10 +0000

“If I kill over in Wal-Mart, drag my body over to Neimans.”

Harr

Paula Anne — Mon, 01 Mar 2010 23:26:26 +0000

“Everybody cares about a piece of shit sometimes.”

E603

Paula Anne — Mon, 01 Mar 2010 23:25:26 +0000

“Sometimes Lady GaGa looks good. Sometimes she looks dead.”

J Chris, Adam, and Me

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 03:19:08 +0000

J Chris and Adam: “If we don’t get any ass, you’re gonna get two MacBooks up your asshole.”
Me: “That’s gonna be an expensive asshole.”
Adamn: “You’re gonna wanna crackbook that.”

Wimbo

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 03:16:19 +0000

“Who is this mother fucker that crawled in my air mattress?!”
(When he slept on an air mattress at Kevbo’s house after a big party)

Mel

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 03:15:01 +0000

“Why would you do that?”
(Mocking Harr)

Tom Hall

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 03:14:06 +0000

“I don’t care about politics, I just wanna get paid.”

Anonymous

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 03:00:01 +0000

“All I have now is 30 dollars, a bag of grass, and a t-shirt.”

Anonymous

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 02:58:56 +0000

“It’s not that much pot, but it’s enough to get a ticket.”

Anonymous

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 02:58:18 +0000

“We are headed to the mountains. Dude, we got lots and lots of ups and downs.”

Anonymous

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 02:55:59 +0000

“I don’t think yankees can make a living writing Hallmark cards.”

Anonymous

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 02:54:49 +0000

“We are gonna do this this and this and fuck in a tree.”

Anonymous

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 02:53:50 +0000

“We’re getting married. I don’t know when he’s gonna divorce me now.”
(Making fun of this girl because she won’t break up with her boyfriend. And instead is just waiting on him to breakup with her)

Anonymous

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 02:45:48 +0000

“See, that’s why they pick the crops and we don’t.”

Anonymous

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 02:44:41 +0000

“We should start running, so like when she comes back she’ll be like ‘I’m skinny!’ and we’ll be like ‘We’re skinnier!!’

Anonymous

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 02:41:46 +0000

“Black people are never right.”

Clayfuck

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 02:41:16 +0000

“I know. Ard told me that they were BFFs at the pool. Stupid sluts all attract to each other.”
(Talking about Mildred and Katz)

Anonymous

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 02:38:54 +0000

“I’m not giving up a great friendship just because you had your first boyfriend.”

Anonymous

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 02:38:06 +0000

“I’m so glad she doesn’t have any money for weed, that way she doesn’t act like an idiot all the time.”

Anonymous

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 02:36:54 +0000

“You need a chimney sweep for your weed tools.”

Anonymous

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 02:36:20 +0000

“I wish drug dealers had store hours, that way we know we are getting our drugs.”
(Saying this on a Sunday and if there were legit hours people would know to call or not. For example: Noone calls Chik-Fil-A on Sundays because they are clearly not open)

Anonymous

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 02:32:18 +0000

“What is with these non potheads buying bowls? It’s not a fashion statement. It’s a way of life.”

Adamn about Mel's door handle

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 02:30:58 +0000

“I like your door handle. It’s smoother than butter.”

Jonesy

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 02:29:41 +0000

“I could jack-off with Perts shampoo and it not hurt.”

Adam Jones

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 02:28:45 +0000

“I had to recollect my life. I had to find my watch, my debit card….”

Anonymous

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 02:26:50 +0000

“I mean if she supports her own disease.”
(Reason for purchasing red ipod)

Anonymous

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 02:25:14 +0000

Person 1: “What did you do all summer?”
Person 2: “Work to buy that weed.”

Anonymous

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 02:23:43 +0000

“They don’t live in her house. They live in her mind.”
(Talking about ghosts)

Anonymous

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 02:22:59 +0000

“Black people need to get off the radio.”

Anonymous

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 02:22:22 +0000

“I accidently packed my phone instead.”
(A hypothetical reason as to why it took as long to text back)

Anonymous

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 02:19:13 +0000

“I don’t want a kief weed infested toothbrush.”

Anonymous

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 02:18:08 +0000

“Mom! At least I’m buying alcohol and not weed.”

Tom Hall

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 02:09:23 +0000

“I can hear a mouse pissin’ on cotton in the corner.”

Steve-o

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 02:04:47 +0000

“I had no idea that I was scheduling my on intervention.”

Kristalsss

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 02:03:19 +0000

“Okay… I’ll just use a dirty sock.”
(Trying to find something to wipe with after popping a squat by the car at a concert)

Wyatt

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 02:01:23 +0000

“You can work around the outbreaks.”

Mildred to Me

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 02:00:56 +0000

“Fuck off! It’s fuck off Paula scent.”
(I asked her what perfume she was wearing)

Mel to Clay

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 01:58:21 +0000

“My feelings are hurt. Are yours hurt?”

Harr

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 01:52:28 +0000

“Have you ever seen a fat thing? Like a wheat thin, but a fat thin…”

Dr. Spitler

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 01:51:13 +0000

“Choose the hill you’re willing to die on. Is this the hill I’m willing to die on based on what I believe in?”

Dave

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 01:50:19 +0000

(He is at a red light and a cop is across the street. Dave says this while making an illegal U-turn)
“Well, if he’s coming to get me, then he’s coming to get me.”

Tom Hall's Boss

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 01:45:10 +0000

“You’re the most uptight guy in America. Sit your ass down.”

Meghan Henderson

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 01:43:06 +0000

“Shove your A’s up your B.”

In Life-Guarding Class

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 01:42:07 +0000

Dustin to McKenzie: “Crack kills.”
McKenzie’s response: “Well, in this case it saves.”

Albert and Kiefy

Paula Anne — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 01:35:26 +0000

Albert: “You can get a lot of people fed with those.”
Kiefer: “I’m not hungry anymore… thanks for the shot.”
(Talking about Jell-o shots)

Kristy about some rando girl

Paula Anne — Mon, 22 Feb 2010 19:33:38 +0000

“I just want to smack her in the head and tell her to smarten up.”

Kris Rogers

Paula Anne — Mon, 22 Feb 2010 19:32:25 +0000

“I’m sayin’ she got money. Fix that.”

Kevin to Kristy

Paula Anne — Mon, 22 Feb 2010 19:30:28 +0000

“You’re apparently on the best terms and he won’t come over here and say hey…?”

Katz

Paula Anne — Mon, 22 Feb 2010 19:28:20 +0000

“If I could pee right now, life would be perfect.”
(Katz had to go to the hospital for a injured knee. She was in a stretcher and was given a drug and a warm blanket by a cute nurse named Matthew. The only catch was she had been complaining about peeing since we got to the hospital. So, she asked Matthew and he was like yeah.. let me get a cup because we might need a urine sample. (45 minutes later) Katz still has to pee)

Harr

Paula Anne — Mon, 22 Feb 2010 19:21:35 +0000

“I wish I could sing (pause) I wish that all the time.”

Paula Anne — Mon, 22 Feb 2010 19:20:01 +0000

Teacher: “Harry’s having trouble with bullying.”
Mom: “So, that’s character building.”

Let's go to prison

Paula Anne — Mon, 22 Feb 2010 19:18:07 +0000

“There is a such thing called karma, and we don’t wanna get on the wrong side of that.”

Dr. Grady

Paula Anne — Mon, 22 Feb 2010 19:16:18 +0000

“Lord, I’ll follow you………… when my dad dies.”

Kevin

Paula Anne — Mon, 22 Feb 2010 19:09:21 +0000

“You would think a 150 dollar remote could change channels.”

Harr and Me

Paula Anne — Mon, 22 Feb 2010 19:07:06 +0000

Me: “I could see Chris speed skating.”
Harr: “Figure, maybe.”

Tom Hall

Paula Anne — Mon, 22 Feb 2010 19:05:31 +0000

“I had a Cadillac’s taste on a Volkswagen’s budget.”

Peanut to J Chris

Paula Anne — Mon, 22 Feb 2010 19:03:43 +0000

“You steal my koozie, I steal your hoe.”

Mel to Me

Paula Anne — Mon, 22 Feb 2010 19:01:50 +0000

“Change it! This is giving me a hangover.”
(Talking about Miley Cyrus’ song See You Again)