The Crackbook

Kevbo

“Legit shit”

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LA Roadtrip sayings that Adamn and Kevbo said nonstop

“Yea, we’re like an hour and 30 minutes away.”

“Suck my dick suck my mother fucking dick.”

“Chilli dogs.”

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Kevvbooo

I thought it was cookie.”

(But is was actually a piece of sausage from MICKdons from the night before.)

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Kev about Adamn

“Adam just farted and I’m about to yack all over my goddamn equipment.”

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Kevarrooooskyy

“I don’t understand anything with 2 legs and a vagina.”

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Kevbo about Jameson

“What? Did he did get ejected and land in a pile of poison ivvy?’

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Kevbo’s Anyalisis of himself

“One half is bc my dads a yankee and the other half is bc I’m Kevbo.”

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Keybo

“I didn’t know how easy it was to charter a private jet. That gives me a great idea. Let’s get a jet and tennis balls and make it rain on everyone.”

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Kevin to Kristy

“Just 7 more of these cleanings..they’ll be back to normal”

(When Kris cleaned the glass tables with organge glow istead of windex.)

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Kevbooo to Me

“What are you allergic to fun?”

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Kev

“It’s too legit to fucking quit!”

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Kevbo

“Yeah, my sister had a bunches of scrunches in her kaboodle.”

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Kevbo

“This one is running rich and the other is isn’t running at all.”

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Kevbo

“F.Y,I: Flying Under the Influence.”

It’s not rape it’s surprise sex.”

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Kevin

“I feel that if I put my head this close to the book I should learn it.”

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Kevbo

“Go lose some weight. Why don’t you run to the car.”

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Kevbo while laying by the pool

“My laptop feels like it’s gonna catch on fire.”

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Kev to Me and Mel

“Why don’t you get one by your snatch patch so that way no one knows.”

(Talking about tatoos to Me and Mel.)

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Kevbo about golf to Mel

“It ull be comin’ to your backyard….You live on a golf course right?”

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Kevbo and the gas guy in Orangeburg

The gas guy: “Do you generally sign anything?”

Kevbo: “I don’t generally come to Charleston.”

(Kevin being a sarcastic smartass)

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Kevbo

“Houston…sounds like a pornstar name.”

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Kevbo

“Let’s bag this operation.”

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Kevbo

“I’m ready to set the buc school on fire and make Don Little’s wife’s pussy quiver.”

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Kev and Mel

“It smells like an 8 year old gymanstics piss.”

(Talking about Kev’s feet when he takes then out of his Sperrys.)

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Kevbo

“Did I moon you or it’s that sluzy?”

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Kev to AnnA

“..sounds like a smoker’s cough.”

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Kevbo

“I like to eat outside…it’s easier to dine and dash. You’re already half way there.”

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Kevbo to Rammyreiz

(Ryan running into a chair)

Kevbo’s reaction: “How did that feel?”

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Kev and Adamn about appearing in court

Adam: “What are you gonna do?”

Kev: “Not drop the soap…and scottie told me to wear a shirt and kakis.”

Adam: “No! You should be wearing a shirt, a tie, and a suit…a tuxedo.”

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Me and Kev about CSU

Me: “Oh, they give an extensions.”

Kev: “Yeah, they will probably extend their foot in my ass.”

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Kevvvvo

“Do you like dick with crabs in it.”

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Kev to Mel

“That’s bc it’s cold outside you silly sleepy head.”

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Kevbo (LA Roadtrip)

“Oh, they’re little hafies… so a little kid can’t jump out the back on a roadtrip.”

(Talking about how Mel’s back windows of her car don’t go all the way down and why this is.)

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Kev (LA Roadtrip)

“Wake up horsies.”

(Kev tryin’ to pass a truck on the interstate in Adamn’s rover.)

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