“If I was a girl, I’d be a mud duck.”

“I know. Ard told me that they were BFFs at the pool. Stupid sluts all attract to each other.”
(Talking about Mildred and Katz)

“See, I love her family… but she’s an idiot.”

“I feel like you have birds living in your hair all the time.”
(Talking about my hair)

“Ain’t nothin’ like a good shit in the shower.”

“Cooper is still my boy. He may be a retard but I still love him.”

“Honey, have you still got your viginity or only the box it came in?”

(After Michael Jackson died.)
“Ha. The world is comin’ to an end! Once your box is unfreshed its all over.”

“Your fresh box is worthless to the world since it hasn’t been cracked open yet.”

“Stupid sluts all attract each other.”

“Paula, I’m clayfuck… I’ll figure it out.”

“I’ll fiddle fartle on your face.”

“I’ll crack book your fuckin’ box cause it ain’t never been cracked up.”

“Shoot, I’ll take it on the road with a side of sweet tea.”

(Talking about box.)

“MeL, what if we get married and you don’t ever let me eat your box. That’s grounds for divorce!”

“Just tell meL for my birthday to box me up.”

“I’ll put these crocs in your box.”

“Don’t pinch me meL… that causes cancer!”